Funny Quotes

I have an all-Japanese design team, and none of them speak English. So it’s often funny and surprising how my ideas end up lost in translation.

Democrats are dumb and Republicans are stupid, but the difference between dumb and stupid is dumb isn’t funny. Dumb is when you say something and the whole room goes, ‘What did he say?’

They did that little thing on South Park, and they mentioned my name and had a character of me judging a Halloween contest. It was really funny. That made me the coolest aunt on earth.

Being funny is one of my greatest strengths. I can make girls smile when they’re down, and when they’re having a good time, I can carry on the joke.

So, I’m the Eighth Wonder of the World. It’s flattering and very, very funny.

I have Slavic fat pads that make me look like a chipmunk and arched predatory eyebrows. With that, you’re not going to get funny. That’s why I play so many bad guys.

I loved being in the film called ‘Carnal Knowledge’ – the one with Jack Nicholson, which was very dark but a really brilliant movie. I loved being in ‘The Ritz.’ ‘The Ritz’ I think is just hilarious. I just saw it again recently and by God, it’s still funny!

It’s funny to find there are still people around who think if a musician has schooling, it automatically makes him a lesser jazz player. But you don’t learn jazz in school.

I basically started performing for my mother, going, ‘Love me!’ What drives you to perform is the need for that primal connection. When I was little, my mother was funny with me, and I started to be charming and funny for her, and I learned that by being entertaining, you make a connection with another person.

I find it so funny that people find me so interesting.

It doesn’t matter how many times the audience has heard it before. If it’s funny, it’s funny.

I think being funny is not anyone’s first choice.