Funny Quotes

I learned a great lesson early on, even before I was really an actor, from that movie ‘Planes, Trains & Automobiles’ that John Hughes made: that you could make a movie that’s really, really, really, really funny, and sometimes you can still achieve… making the audience feel very deep emotions as well.

I know what I look like. I’m not a babe who’s automatically going to be the leading-lady type. I think I would always be cast as the friend. I probably tend to look crap more often than I look good. I like messing around and pulling funny faces and doing funny walks.

It took forever for me to get work because I was a political comic, and now it’s become good business, and God knows how long that’ll last. You have to do it night after night after night to kind of make it. I still find myself on ‘Piers Morgan’ or on some show and I think, ‘I hope this is funny.’

The comedians I liked were Bill Cosby and Steven Wright, like just always as a comedic actor. I always liked Gary Larson, who’s really funny for a cartoonist, obviously.

My dad was a doctor, and he would tell us a lot of nasty, funny stories from the hospital. It was funny to me when I’d go over to other people’s houses and they didn’t talk about intestines at the table.

Hollywood’s just not funny.

I auditioned for a solo in church and got it. I was about seven and I sang a song called, ‘Jesus, I Heard You Had a Big House’ and I remember people standing up at the end and me thinking, ‘Oh, I think I’m going to like this.’ That’s how it all began. Sounds funny to say you got your start in church, but I did.

You know, if you play on home soil sometimes funny things can happen and you have that push of the crowd.

I was a business major at the University of Richmond, and after I graduated, I took a job at a corporate ad agency. I had comedic dreams, but I also had a realistic look at what I had to do when I left school: maybe I’m funny, but maybe I’m one of a hundred thousand funny people, you know?

I don’t know if I’m embarrassed because I think it’s a funny show, but I could imagine there being a snootiness about it, but I do find ‘The Big Bang Theory’ very funny. I think that’s a good show. I think it’s fun, I like the actors; I think they’re all doing a great job.

Austin Theory’s young, super-talented and thinks he’s the cat’s meow. But I’m just going to punish him. It’s going to be pretty funny to see his eyes after the first few minutes when he realizes that there’s nowhere to run.

I went to my first school dance on the set of ‘Spider-Man.’ The funny thing is, it wasn’t actually real. I didn’t choose my dress or my date or anything about it. I just showed up for work.