Funny Quotes

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.

Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.

If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.

All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific.

My life needs editing.

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

I can resist everything except temptation.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

The chief function of the body is to carry the brain around.

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?