Men always want to be a woman’s first love – women like to be a man’s last romance.

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt towards people whom we personally dislike.

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.

All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That’s his.

Whenever a man does a thoroughly stupid thing, it is always from the noblest motives.

Society exists only as a mental concept; in the real world there are only individuals.

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.

It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious.

Now that the House of Commons is trying to become useful, it does a great deal of harm.

In America the President reigns for four years, and Journalism governs forever and ever.

Fathers should be neither seen nor heard. That is the only proper basis for family life.

There is no necessity to separate the monarch from the mob; all authority is equally bad.

Men marry because they are tired; women, because they are curious; both are disappointed.

If one plays good music, people don’t listen and if one plays bad music people don’t talk.

When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her.

The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself.

Every portrait that is painted with feeling is a portrait of the artist, not of the sitter.

Nothing can cure the soul but the senses, just as nothing can cure the senses but the soul.

What we have to do, what at any rate it is our duty to do, is to revive the old art of Lying.